You're Application Has Been Unsucessful

So, I’m still in the market for a job. Even though some places are reporting signs of a break in the clouds, jobs for my lowly level remain few and far between, and spending hour upon hour trawling internet job ads and crafting covering letters – only for them to be skim-read and disregarded – is becoming a bit soul destroying.

However, without a doubt the most heartbreaking thing about the whole process is the rejection emails. Rejection emails are entirely different to rejection letters. Rejection letters indicate that some poor sod has had to go to the bother of actually reading your CV in order to glean your address, so at least your details have graced the eyes of somebody in a publishing house, albeit the workie. No, rejection emails are much worse.

Now, let it be said that I don’t break down into tears every time one of these pings into my inbox. Not at all. As the Press Gazette reports, there are at least 1,800 unemployed journos spending their days in a similar fashion to me, so it’s not really a surprise that among that number there are individuals far more qualified than I.

However, I really, really take umbrage with the frequency with which these emails are coming back to me littered with spelling errors, punctuation mistakes and grammatical fuck-ups. That’s just poor show anyway, never mind the fact that it’s the antithesis of these crimes that form the very foundations of the jobs I am applying for. One shining example is laid out below:

***
Dear Racheal,
Many thanks for you’re application to (Magazine). We have reviewed your CV and have on at this occasion decided not to call you for interview. We wish you every luck…etc.

Yours sincerely,.
(Person)

***

Perhaps, however, I should be grateful that they at least made a stab at spelling my name correctly, as the following treat popped up not an hour ago:

***
Dear [INSERT NAME],
Thankyou for your interest in [JOB TITLE], but after much careful considerations we have decided not to process your application further.

***

I’m sorry, Mailshot Wizard, but something tells me you’re fibbing about the ‘careful consideration’ bit there.

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One thought on “You're Application Has Been Unsucessful

  1. Why oh why are you keeping the names of these shameful publications from us? They’ve already rejected you; the least you could do is thrust their incompetence in the face of the blogerati so copies of that email can end up on FAILblog.

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